Relational Evangelism
Tucked in the cover of my Bible where I can enjoy them each day are photographs of dear friends who came into God’s family via the channel of relationships. They’re all different, spanning the gamut from a former atheist and his family to a lovely redheaded woman from Texas who has become one of my dearest friends on earth. In between are entire families who are believers because people we led to Christ in turn led their friends to Christ. By far my favorite photographs are those of my spiritual grandbabies. We call this “relational evangelism,” and though the Evil One whispers in our ear, tempting us to think evangelism is complicated and difficult, it’s really very simple.
Give the Gospel to People You Already Know
So what is so easy about relational evangelism? Let’s begin with the people we already know. Who has God already placed in your life who needs to be introduced to your best friend, Jesus? This may seem trite to some, but isn’t that what evangelism is—introducing people to Jesus? Think of the pride you feel for your child. Are you ashamed to introduce him to your friends? Absolutely not! In fact, you may catch yourself having to be careful not to brag about your child! It’s the Evil One who whispers doubts in our ear: “This is not a good time. . . . You’ll ruin your relationship if you talk to her about Jesus.” He whispers questions—”What if you blow it and she becomes hardened to the Truth? . . . What if she rejects Jesus? What then?” Resist the Evil One. Listen to the still, small voice of God’s Spirit and introduce your friends to Christ.
Make Relationships for the Purpose of Giving the Gospel
The second simple key to relational evangelism is to make relationships for the purpose of giving the gospel. Every week we begin Exchange Seminars by asking believers what obstacles they face in witnessing. One of the first voiced each week is, “I don’t know many lost people.” Sadly, we’ve insulated ourselves from the lost. Our lives are filled to the brim with Christian friends and Christian activities. We think we don’t have time to witness, and if we do have time, we don’t know whom we would witness to. It’s time we addressed this problem.
Purposely form redemptive relationships. The Redeemer gave us a perfect picture in John 4 where we find Him taking the path “good” Jews would never take as He moved from Judea to Galilee. His path intersected with a Samaritan woman—truly a divine appointment. Expand the well-worn path from your home to church, from your home to your Christian friend’s. Step out of your comfort zone. Invite your neighbor for coffee, your coworker for dinner, host a block party, choose a non- Christian doctor or painter or hairdresser. It’s the Evil One, whispering lies in our ears, who tempts us to think we don’t know lost people. Recently my friend Kristen Zuray wrote, “We at Abide Bible Church have been hard at work trying to present The Exchange (gospel presentation) to neighbors, coworkers, and our community. Since you were here, several of us have started Bible studies or have gone through the gospel with someone. We’ve held social functions in our home to further relationships.” Let’s follow Kristen’s example and make lifestyle changes. Let’s open our eyes. Unbelievers are everywhere. In fact, there are more of them than us!
Cultivate the Art of Witnessing in a Relational Way
The last simple truth is, cultivate the art of witnessing in a relational way. In the beautiful Rocky Mountains where I live, the warm spring sun melts the winter snow and sends water churning down the rivers. Eventually, that water ends up in the Pacific Ocean. The river is a channel, taking water from the mountains to the sea. Similarly, relationships are channels that God plans to use to take His truth to our friends.
Often we find ourselves intimidated by unbelievers. Let’s face it, they don’t understand our lives. “You enjoy church?” Their crude language causes us to blush, and then we face their apologies as they express embarrassment.
This summer, while Jeff and I celebrated our thirty-second anniversary in a quaint restaurant in old Phoenix, the kind waiter, attempting to make our dinner special, brought us three small, delicious looking drinks. Later he returned to ask if we had enjoyed them. There on the table sat three small, untouched glasses. What was I to say? Honesty seemed the best route. “This was so kind of you, but I have to tell you, I’ve never taken a drink of alcohol in my life.” He drew in his breath and stepped back in unbelief.
It was a reminder—we are different. But this obstacle doesn’t have to stop us. Remember, we have Someone they desperately need. We know, based on God’s Word, their life without Christ is empty. We have God’s Spirit at work, drawing the lost to Himself. We’re not in this alone. Let the Gracious One make you gracious. Speak the truth in love. Create friendly environments—over coffee at Starbucks, in your home over lunch. Remember to tell your friend about the One who changed your life. Share what life was like without Him and what life is like with Him. Introduce your friend to Jesus and invite her to make the life-changing decision to accept Him as her Lord and Savior. Don’t abandon the relationship if she refuses. Rather, continue to cultivate your relationship.
Just yesterday my dear friend Mary Ellen shared in the celebration of our daughter’s soon-to-be-born baby girl. Five years ago she and her husband, Vann, and Jeff and I shared four meals in their home. After each, we would go to what they fondly called “the Bible Study Room” in their basement. After lesson three of The Exchange Bible Study, they both accepted Christ. Less than a year later Vann was in Heaven. Mary Ellen’s friendship has been one of life’s sweet blessings.
Just last week Jeff needed financial advice and went to breakfast with Karlton, a financial planner who was an avowed atheist nine years ago. But he accepted Christ after several late evenings spent in their home studying The Exchange Bible Study.
In the flyleaf of my Bible is a picture of Michael and Renee, still wet from the baptismal waters. These friends of Mary Ellen’s were saved and baptized because she cared enough about their souls to invite them to do the Bible study. While I played with the children, Jeff, Mary Ellen, Michael, and Renee would study the Bible. Not long after Michael’s salvation he was running with his neighbor and invited him and his wife to do the Bible study. Guess what? They were saved.
Sometimes I’ve been surprised when people accept Christ. The Evil One whispers, “She’s too rich, too steeped in sin, too antagonistic.” But greater is He who is in us! The thread that ties all these stories together is the golden thread of relationships. These are cultivated relationships. We’ve shared meals, hiked the Rockies, and enjoyed deep conversations over morning runs. Each knows the inside of our home, and we know the inside of theirs. We’re friends. Relational evangelism really isn’t hard. The photographs in my Bible serve as daily reminders that God still saves and transforms lives, and He delights in using simple vessels, believers who are willing to step out in faith and lovingly give the gospel.
Anna Musgrave serves with her husband Jeff in The Exchange evangelism ministry. They train believers and are active in evangelism around the world. Follow the link for resources from The Exchange ministry.
(Originally published in FrontLine • March/April 2013. Click here to subscribe to the magazine.)