Do Everything Without Complaining
The first five days of Creation Week in Genesis chapter one have a cadence marked by the words “And God said”:
“And God said, ‘Let there be light’” (verse 3)
“And God said, ‘Let there be a vault between the waters’” (verse 6)
“And God said, ‘Let the water under the sky be gathered to one place’” (verse 9)
“And God said, ‘Let the land produce vegetation” (verse 11)
“And God said, ‘Let there be lights in the vault of the sky’” (verse 14)
“And God said, ‘Let the water teem with living creatures’” (verse 20)
“And God said, ‘Let the land produce living creatures’” (verse 24)
“And God said, ‘Let us make man in our image’” (verse 26)
Then, suddenly, the pattern breaks when the text says, “God blessed them and said to them” (verse 28). Here we not only have God speaking, but speaking TO humanity because, as His image-bearers they alone among God’s creation are able to communicate as He does. We have the unique capacity to receive God’s revelation, interpret His world, and worship Him in it.
But these abilities from our gracious God are, unfortunately, distorted as sin usurps the gifts and dethrones the Giver. As a result, we now speak in ways that, instead of reflecting God’s character and enhancing His praise, demand what we desire and denounce when we’re deprived. In other words, we whine and complain when don’t get what we want, professing Christians included. And all the while Scripture commands, “Do everything without complaining” (Philippians 2:14).
The fallen tendency to grumble does harm to everyone and everything it touches – families, schools, businesses, churches. About thirty years ago I read an article in a (now defunct) business journal that insightfully explained how complaining affects an organization, and what can be done to correct it.
We now speak in ways that, instead of reflecting God’s character and enhancing His praise, demand what we desire and denounce when we’re deprived.
The Bag
What happens when a person encounters something that he or she doesn’t like, and the person neither changes his or her thoughts nor attempts to correct the thing at fault? As long as the person continues to encounter the offending situation, he or she will continue to experience bad feelings, and those feelings will accumulate. I call that putting feelings in a bag.
To understand the bag, think of it as being similar to a sack used to ship five pounds of oranges: nylon mesh about two feet long and one foot wide with a string through the top. A person may have several or even many bags, and each is labeled with the name of the person, the thing, or the event to which the person responds with bad feelings. Bags have labels like “the company,” “my boss,” “this place,” etc.
The feelings go into the bag and fall to the bottom where they sit. With each new encounter, more feelings go into the bag. It begins to fill up and become heavy. Also, the feelings start to decompose as they remain in the bag. In fact, over time the feelings start to become soft, mushy, and liquid; and they begin to take on an unpleasant odor. Before long, the bag is filled with something that is heavy, runny, and stinks.
What Happens to Bags
Frequently, bags are dumped, and more often than not a bag is dumped on someone or something not associated with the label on the bag. For example, members of an employee’s family may receive the bag with the name of the boss on it, or an innocent store clerk may receive the contents of the bag labeled with the name of a product purchased in the store. Sometimes bags are dumped on the person whose name is on the bag, and often when that happens the contents of the bag come out in an explosive rush, overwhelming the recipient.
Even more frequently than dumping, a person will take hold of the rope attached to the top of the bag and swing it around at a high rate of speed, usually in the presence of one or more people. Try to picture this in your mind’s eye: a mesh bag on the end of a long rope, filled with a mushy, foul-smelling substance, being whipped around at a high rate of speed. What happens? The stuff winds up all over everybody.
It is my observation that swinging bags with varying degrees of intensity is a common pastime of many people.
In the Swing
In many organizations there are regular bag swinging sessions. For example, consider the coffee break conversation of three employees:
- “Did you see that stupid memo yesterday? Those people must be idiots to think that I …” (Swish, Swish, Swish).
- “Yes, well, if there is anything that gets to me, it’s people who don’t carry their own weight. Do you know what John did …?” (Swish, Swish, Swish).
- “I’m glad I don’t have to worry about working with John but, of course, I have lazy Suzy in my group and she …” (Swish, Swish, Swish).
These statements sound like familiar (sinful) human ways of dealing with frustrations, disappointments, and unrealized expectations. And they are.
What’s Wrong With Bags?
First, it takes a certain amount of energy to carry bags around. Since a person might have any number of bags, the more bags, the more energy the person devotes to maintaining them.
Second, as the bags fill up and become burdensome, a person will tend to dump or swing a bag even when the immediate situation bears no direct relationship to the label on a particular bag. Thus, one or more partially filled bags get in the way of a person’s ability to be in the present and deal in a straightforward way with immediate situations.
Third, bag dumping and swinging by one person affects other people. One swinger tends to provoke others to bring out their bags. Often, bag swinging is like an infectious disease.
Fourth, a person could use the time and energy devoted to bags in many other ways; ways that could be more effective both for the person and the people around them.
Fifth, a person who channels bad feelings into a bag rarely has to take responsibility for those feelings. The person does not have to face the fact that a subjective reaction to an event and the event itself are separate, and that while the event itself may not be of the person’s making, his or her reaction to it is his/her responsibility.
Sixth, the process of filling, carrying, swinging, and dumping bags is habit forming. It inhibits a person’s ability to try other ways of dealing with situations that are disagreeable.
Bag swinging is like an infectious disease … the process of filling, carrying, swinging, and dumping bags is habit forming.
Rules for Breaking the Habit
Rule #1: Evaluate whether whatever is bothering you is a real problem, or something you’ve allowed to fester and become a problem.
Rule #2: Discuss something or someone that is bothering you only with someone who can do something about it.
Rule #3: Don’t permit people to discuss with you people or things you can’t do anything about.
And God said … to US
The observations of a management consultant from a defunct journal are helpful, but Christians always have the requirements of God available in His Word. May we see the practical value of the Lord’s commands, and put them into practice in our homes, workplaces, and churches.
The mouth speaks what the heart is full of. (Matthew 12:34)
Everyone will have to give account on the day of judgment for every empty word they have spoken. (Matthew 12:36)
Do everything without complaining. (Philippians 2:14)
Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. (Ephesians 4:29)
With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse human beings, who have been made in God’s likeness. Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers and sisters, this should not be. (James 3:9-10)
Ken Brown is the pastor of Community Bible Church in Trenton, MI. We republish his article by permission.
Photo by Omar Prestwich on Unsplash